Facebook has made it all too easy to go retrosexual, meaning rekindling things with an ex, be it someone you knew biblically for just one night, dated for years, or even lusted after in the past but never got together with when you’d previously had the chance.
Use of social media has expanded into older demographics over the past few years; with that, reconnecting with past loves has grown in popularity on the website.
“Facebook makes it easier for you to take that first step of finding someone again. It has finally provided a way for people to reach out to someone without fear of rejection,” Ranier Romero-Canyas, a Columbia University psychology research scientist, told Time magazine.
Therapists’ offices are reportedly filling up with folks who have gotten back in touch with exes via Facebook and other networking sites, only to the detriment of their current relationships. If you are presently in a committed partnership then you are placing it in danger by getting into a retrosexual situation — even if it’s just flirting.
Dipping into that pool of former lovers is not only enticing but plain ole human nature. Experts say that it’s only natural to wonder what happened to an old love and to think about what could have been after a relationship was interrupted for whatever reason.
A few things to keep in mind as you find yourself revisiting love situations that quite possibly should remain in the past. Retrosexuals tend to justify past things in former love situations that were dealbreakers. They manage to manipulate or second-guess the reasons why they left the relationship in the first place. Keep in mind that once you go down memory lane you may be faced with the same ole, same ole.
An ex is an ex for a reason. Before you succumb to someone’s Facebook sweet-talkings and allow an ex back into your life, perhaps you should re-examine why you left them in the first place. Were they liars, cheaters, or did they give you a sexually transmitted disease?
Experts advise before getting into a retrosexual relationship, give it time; wait at least six months or more before you jump back in, this timeframe will allow you to view the situation more objectively. Waiting before you take the plunge a second time around may reduce the likelihood of unacceptable repeat behaviors on your watch, and if the reconnection is meant to be, it will allow credibility to build.
Image courtesy of the Daily Mail.