Project Fishbowl: Scribe Needs Photo Fix

Does have a staff photographer? By the looks of things, the in-house artist doesn’t exist or else he or she has a thing for chin exposure. Today, with the help of Real Housewives of D.C. stylist Paul Wharton, the regular FishbowlDC cast of characters and an Anonymous TV Consultant, we analyze Matthew Boyle’s new site photograph in another episode of Project Fishbowl. As they say in Hollywood, there’s never a second chance to make a first impression, but Boyle might want to scrap that adage.

As we suspected, Boyle took the picture himself. When asked about it, he said, “I took it. And it was really a quick photo to just get something up fast so I could start writing stories,  which I’ve been doing all week. It’s more than likely going to change very soon.”

We hope the following will urge him along.

Peter: Why is Boyle using the autopsy photo of a dissected fetal pig in this pic?

Eddie: “Disclaimer: This is a photo of the author of this story, NOT the police sketch of a serial roofie artist.”

Betsy: This picture contains more chins than a Chinese phone book. Boyle, we like you, you’re like family at this point, but have we taught you nothing in our time together? You’re a reporter, not a bouncer. You want to inform readers, not frighten them.

Piranhamous: And I thought Steve Lawrence had big jowls. Wonder where he’s going to bury those nuts he has stuffed in there?

Paul: This man is in need of one of my male supermodel photo posing sessions immediately. I’m sure he’s a hot stud but this picture says “Total Dud.”

Anonymous TV Consultant: I love a man with a strong jaw. On a serious note, his eyebrows look like two squirrels mating on his forehead.

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Publish date: December 6, 2012 © 2020 Adweek, LLC. - All Rights Reserved and NOT FOR REPRINT