The Post in Which We Cave to the Current Justin Bieber Explosion

We here at FBLA find the current fascination with pre-pubescent pop star Justin Bieber beyond creepy. Seriously, he looks like a human version of a snow egret that wants to be on “The L Word” — a baby snow egret at that. If he just stuck to the Disney Channel and Tiger Beat covers — maybe the Today Show — we’d be fine with it. But he’s everywhere. We can’t get away from him. He played the White House the other day. And before that he took over Funny or Die for a day. Why, Bieber? Why? He’s Canadian too, did you know that? At least Britney Spears is from Louisiana. Kids grow up fast down there. If she hadn’t become an international fetish as a teenager she probably would have had three kids by the time she turned 16. But Bieber should be home, watching hockey and eating french fries and gravy — at least until he gets some armpit hair.

Anyway, we needed to get that off our chest before we give you Dr. Phil with Bieber bangs, courtesy of TMZ.