We’ve had multiple people email us this story, wondering if LA Weekly/VVM uber-boss Mike Lacey has lost his marbles. Always interesting to see what the brass comes up with when they actually sit down and attempt write something.
In this case, Lacey’s most recent piece reports on efforts to round up illegal Canadian Jews in Arizona, who have infiltrated graduate schools across the state and hang around in bank parking lots trying to refinance people’s loans. There’s an accompanying picture of a shifty Jewish menace.
We’re going to assume the piece was meant for April Fool’s, even though the web byline is April 8.
A sampling of Lacey’s comic prose:
Jews first began to leave Canada because there simply were not enough graduate-school openings for their children. The exodus put unbearable pressure on American dental, medical, psychiatric, and law schools.
Parents of Canadian Jews in graduate school have taken to bank parking lots in an effort to raise money for tuition. The clusters of men outside the banks offer advice, for a fee, on all forms of market speculation.
State Senator Russell Pearce, a Republican from Mesa and the primary mover of Senate Bill 1070 and House Bill 2632, challenged critics of his legislation:
“The government of the United States wants to tell American Jews at Goldman Sachs how much they can earn, but we can’t tell Canadian Jews to stop earning and learning at our expense?”
Look, we get it. Substitute Jews for Mexicans and the illegal immigration crackdown across the country seems absolutely ridiculous. But, seriously, you still have to make the piece funny.
Lacey starts off with a decent enough premise. But the redundancy just kills the joke. He mentions Jews in bank parking lots four times. Four! Jews are among the easiest targets on the planet. There are literally thousands of self-obsessed Jewish comedians Lacey could have mined for material. Steal a Seinfeld joke or something and stick it in there.
We’re not the only ones who didn’t find Lacey’s piece funny. The Hebrew brothers at Jewcy were none too pleased.
In either a) an egregious act of poor judgement coinciding with the 65th anniversary of the liberation of the Nazi concentration camps or b) a “can you believe the public officials said that?” act of journalism (really – we can’t tell difference here, which is problematic), Michael Lacey, the Executive Editor of Village Voice Media, published THIS in the Phoenix New Times. The actual events and quotes are unfortunately not a joke. To paraphrase: Canadian Jews residing in Pheonix are not surprisingly moneygrubbers and have taken over bank parking lots…blah blah blah…”hook noses”…abortions…”it’s a matter of historical fact that Jews ate Christian babies in the Middle Ages.” I wish we were kidding.